Why Do Men Need to Talk About Anxiety?

Hello, Bella Club reader! Have you noticed how we men are masters of a very specific skill? I'm not talking about changing tires or opening bottles with a lighter. I'm talking about the almost supernatural ability to swallow problems as if they were that olive you don't like in your drink, but swallow anyway so as not to "give a damn".

The "Real Man's Handbook" is out of date

From an early age, the script is very clear: "Men don't cry", "Hang in there", "Don't be weak". We grew up hearing these phrases as if they were sacred mantras. The problem is that this "manual" was written at a time when cavemen had to pretend they weren't afraid of the mammoth so they wouldn't become its lunch. Spoiler: it's 2025, mammoths are extinct, but the fear of appearing vulnerable is still very much alive.

And what is the result of this emotional repression? We are champions in statistics that no one wants to hear: higher suicide rates, alcoholism, risky behaviors, and so on. It's as if we had replaced "don't show fear" with "implode inside, but keep a smile on your face." Big deal, huh?

Anxiety with an "I'm fine" face

Male anxiety is like that friend who shows up at your house unannounced, but instead of saying "hey, how are you?", it manifests itself in other ways:

- That inexplicable irritability when someone is late at the traffic lights

- Insomnia disguised as a "series marathon until 3 am"

- The "just one more beer" that turned into six

- The obsession with work/gym/game that "is not an addiction, it's dedication"

Have you recognized any of these symptoms? Well, you may be using the old trick of turning anxiety into something else that doesn't need to be named or faced.

Anxiety is not "whining", it is biochemistry

Here's something no one tells you: anxiety isn't a whim, a weakness, or something "people who don't have real problems do." It's literally your brain going into survival mode. It's like your body's fire alarm going off while you're trying to watch the game in peace.

When chronic stress sets in, your body produces excess cortisol. It’s as if you’re constantly on guard against a predator, except that the predator is in your head, in your deadlines at work, in your bills, in the pressure to “be successful.” And your body wasn’t designed to live in this state of alert forever.

The guys are starting to talk (and no, the world didn't end)

The good news? There’s a quiet revolution happening. From Mike Tyson to The Rock, Ryan Reynolds to Kevin Love, men you wouldn’t call “fragile” are opening up about mental health. And guess what happened when they spoke up? Nothing bad at all. In fact, they earned even more respect.

Here in Brazil, names like Cauã Reymond, Fábio Assunção and others have already opened up about their challenges with anxiety, depression and addictions. And look: they continue to be references of masculinity, perhaps even more authentic now.

The Anti-Anxiety Toolkit for Testosterone People

No one is suggesting you start posting stories crying to Adele (unless you want to, of course). There are practical ways to deal with anxiety that don’t involve giving up your “man card”:

Rediscover exercise - Not as an obsession, but as an escape valve. Science has proven that 30 minutes of moderate activity releases enough endorphins to beat back stress hormones.

Breathe like a warrior - Breathing techniques aren't just "yoga stuff." They're used by Olympic athletes, elite military personnel, and CEOs under pressure. Four seconds in, four seconds out. Try it for a minute when you feel like you're going to explode.

Find your "verbal pressure cooker" - This could be a specific friend, a therapist, or even a group of guys going through the same challenges. The point is: trapped words become ticking time bombs.

Reevaluate your relationship with alcohol - That beer you drink to "relax" may be doing the exact opposite. Alcohol is a central nervous system depressant that provides short-term relief but increases anxiety in the long term.

Technology on your side - There are meditation apps specifically for men, with deep voices and without that elevator music. Five minutes a day can make more of a difference than hours of "self-medicating" with anything else.

Real strength lies in controlled vulnerability

No one is suggesting that you become an “emotional open door” 24/7. Strategic vulnerability is different from weakness. It’s like in a fight: knowing when to let your guard down can be just as important as knowing when to keep your defenses up.

Men who learn to manage their emotions—not suppress them—tend to have better relationships, more professional success, and, believe it or not, more respect from other men. It's the paradox that few understand: admitting that you're not invulnerable makes you much stronger.

So, have you ever felt your heart race for no apparent reason? Have you ever had that feeling that something bad is going to happen even when everything seems fine? How do you deal with these moments? Share with us in the comments - you can be sure that you are not the only one going through this, and your experience can help other guys who are in the same situation.

Remember: acknowledging anxiety doesn’t make you any less of a man. In fact, facing it head on is probably one of the bravest things you can do.